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Karachi

Its warmth not love, and its comprehension, not the conversation that makes two people closer

Hyderabad: 2 July 2022: I have come to realize that the most essential thing that we can get from another person isn't love but warmth. kindness, softness, consideration and acknowledgement— it is more necessary than just being loved. it is like the first knock of cool wind on your window after an eternal summer. it says in simple words "i care. i know. even if i don't understand you yet, i am here. so, be with me for a little while." i have loved a hundred people and some have loved me back. still, when i find the world a bit too pesky, i don't know if i will find the comfort that i seek. i have realized that in those particular moments, i don't need someone to remind me how much i am loved. even when we are loved, even when we know that someone won't be able to live in this world without us, we all know that on most days, it isn't enough. what we need is a head pat and maybe a few kind words. even eating ice-cream with a stranger would genuinely warm our hearts. i have realized that people and their warmth have saved me my entire life. the hello wave from a girl in a different class who i don't really talk to on a morning when i am not feeling particularly great, the uncle at the convenience store who gives a few candies on a rainy day, the random stranger beside me on bus who offered me their blanket and a snack, the professor who showed interest in my career plan and did their research to help me better, the guy who waits for me everyday because we take the same train and makes small talk sometimes when i'm late, a 'thank you' from the shy kid in my neighbourhood who i helped a week ago, my roommate who cancels all her date plans just to spend time with me on the days she catches me crying— all of this makes me glad that i am alive. the memes that i still receive from a friend who i haven't met in five years makes me wonder if they thought of me and smiled before they sent it. the messages i get from classmates i hardly talk to when i am sick, the long discussions about a tv show or a book with a friend who i know isn't all that interested but still never stops me and eagerly listens to all i have to say, flowers picked by my little niece for me when we go together on picnics, a well-made playlist that an online friend shared with me just because we have similar music taste, my sister reading my horoscope and telling me to wear red on a wednesday morning even when she doesn't believe in it but she knows i find it fun, that mom friend who brings everyone chocolates to eat before we go on a field trip so that we don't go hungry makes me realize that people love other people in underrated ways. even when it isn't love love, it is like humans caring for each other simply because they can. it's so special and goes beyond the idea of conditional love. i have come to realize that in a world where everything is falling apart, the warmth that we can give and receive is how we hold on. when they reach out and extend their arms, even these little things become more than enough.

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