Hyderabad: 7 November 2021: Even when we cannot see it, and even if we won’t allow ourselves to believe it, there is a much healthier and happier way of life waiting for all of us beyond the aspects of our lives with which we’re currently struggling. I’ve found that the single most important key to finding lasting peace is the realization that all suffering is simply a cry from our body and subconscious asking us to love, accept and value ourselves now. All the mental, emotional, physical, financial and spiritual struggle we experience is purely our soul’s way of waking us up to the aspects of ourselves, our lives and our past that we haven’t yet learned how to love or understand fully. Depression, disease, insecurity and pain force us to bring more awareness into our daily lives so we realize the value of living with kindness and compassion for ourselves, other people and all life. Our suffering actually stops us from running and reawakens us to the truth in the present, so we can transform whatever does not support our wellbeing or life purpose. Our struggles are meant to help us learn the lessons beneath what we perceive to be our ‘mistakes’, so we can live each day in a way that creates less suffering and more harmony, not only for ourselves, but also for everyone around us.
Most of us struggle with being ourselves, primarily because we were never supported to become aware of our emotional life as children. We grew up with emotions bottled up, without anyone to help us understand or process what we were feeling because our parents and caregivers were struggling with the same lack of emotional self-awareness. The result of this dynamic is adults who are not consciously aware of what they are feeling today, which translates into not knowing how to express these emotions, let alone communicate them effectively and non-violently.
Before we can express our emotions clearly, we have to be aware of what we’re feeling here in the present, which most of us are not. Rather, we are trapped in our mind thinking, analysing, judging or criticizing, which means that the defensive aspects of our personality that developed to protect us as children are still very active. Regardless of our age, most of us still subconsciously want to remain safe both from being hurt in the present and from feeling the stored hurt from the past.
Once we do become aware of our feelings, needs and desires in the here and now, we can honour who we truly are and learn to express our inner truths with clarity and kindness.
Excerpt from
You Were Not Born To Suffer by Blake D. Bauer